Development Coach

New Year - New Start

2012-01-11T13:45:00.000+02:00

So, what does 2012 have in store for you?

Is this the year you want to make changes?
Are you tired of making excuses for not doing what you know you should be doing?
Do you know what you want to do/achieve this year?
What are your health aspirations?
What are your fitness aspirations?
What are your financial plans this year? Do you want to save, or get yourself out of debt, or help someone else?
How is your relationship?
Are you hiding at home or are you a social butterfly? Do you want to change any of that?
What are you doing towards your spirituality?
Do you want to study?
Which books do you really want to read this year?
What characteristics do you want to work on this year?
Are you excited to get up in the morning and do you feel energised when you are on your way to work?

and last but not least, what are you tolerating? This is always a tricky one.....

If you would like to work with me, on any of the above, please contact me via my email address and let's talk about getting you to where you deserve to be.

2012 is going to be whatever you make it! Now isn't that a nice thought...

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE & OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

TAKE ACTION

2011-11-27T06:13:00.000+02:00

"Take time to deliberate, but when the time for action arrives, stop thinking and go in" Napoleon Bonaparte

Now we all know that Napoleon Bonaparte was a military leader, so this quote probably referred to going to war, but I think it is also true of our day to day lives.

There comes a time when you have to stop thinking and start doing.

Is today the day that you can go into action? Go on, I DARE YOU.....

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What are you tolerating?

2011-09-28T20:23:00.000+02:00

"There is no passion to be found in playing small, in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living" Nelson Mandela

These are wise words from a very wise man. “Madiba” you rock!

Maybe it is time to think about what you are tolerating in your life?

Is it a job that doesn’t excite you any more?
Is it a relationship that needs some attention?
Is it that energy draining friend that just goes on and on about his/her problems and never offers an ear to yours?
Is it the barking dog next door?

If you give some time to this, you will probably find that you are tolerating more than you should be.

Well whose fault is that? If there needs to be change, you probably have to instigate it?

As Madiba says, don’t settle for less than you are capable of living.

Up to you..... and if you need any help with this, I am just an email away!

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE & OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Happiness

2011-09-27T16:23:00.000+02:00

"Happiness is a choice that requires effort at times" – Aeschylus

Are you one of the millions of people out there who is ‘waiting’ to be happy? In other words, I will be happy when:
• I earn more money
• I am 10kg lighter
• I am married
• I have a baby
• I find the perfect man
• I find the perfect job
• I am with the perfect partner
• I have no debt
• Etc. Etc.

If you are waiting for one of the above, or for anything else for that matter, have your realised yet, that you may never be ‘happy’. Why do you think this is?

The quote above answers that question. Happiness is a choice. We can choose to be happy, no matter what our circumstance is. If you are going through a hard time right now, this may sound a bit callous, but believe me it is true. Happiness is a verb, not a noun. It takes action on your part, a conscious decision that ‘I will be happy’ even if it is just for today.

Once you have decided that no matter what, I WILL be happy today, you will be amazed how you will light up like a beacon and attract things that make you happy. (a smile from someone, a dog wagging his tail at you, being able to see the sun shine, a call from a friend).

It is just a decision. Have you decided yet?

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17 Weeks to the end of 2011

2011-09-07T12:20:00.001+02:00

With spring in the air and my energy level rising rapidly, I thought it was time that I sat down and reviewed my year so far. It is always good to do a spring clean at this time of the year and that doesn't only mean cleaning out cupboards and my home, for me it also means re-assessing all areas of my life.

I looked at the calendar and realised that there are only 17 weeks left of 2011! Where has the year gone?

A tool that I use in my life, and in my coaching is the Life Wheel. This enables me to get a very quick look at the main areas of my life.

Health
Career
Spiritual
Frame of Mind
Financial
Relationship/ Partner/ Significant other
Recreation/ Social /Leisure
Family
Personal Growth / Development

So, how do I use this? First I draw a circle and create a segment for each of these areas. (If you are going to do this, you may want to combine or split some areas to make it more personal for you).

Then take some quiet time and rank your level of satisfaction in each of the above areas. You need to be absolutely honest with yourself in this exercise if you would like it to work.

Then have a look and ask yourself some questions:
Are there any surprises for you?
How do you feel about your life as you look at your wheel?
If you were to change one area, which one would have the most impact?
Is there more than one area you would like to work on?
Can you make the necessary changes on your own?
What plans can you make to get it under control?
Who and what could support you to make these changes?

Remember it only takes 21 days to change a habit so imagine what you can do, with concerted effort in 17 weeks!!!

How would you like to be feeling at the end of 2011?
What would you like to have achieved?

Remember the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and hoping for a different result....

Imagine if you don't start working on those areas which need attention. One year from now? 5 years from now?

Need some help with getting things going? Contact me and let's see how I can support you...

I know how I want to be feeling at the end of 2011, do you?

Here's to your continued success in every endeavour!!

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE & OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

10 ways to Combat Lethargy

2011-08-17T14:42:00.002+02:00

I was sitting at my desk yesterday afternoon, in the cold weather and thinking about going to gym. As I looked outside at the overcast sky I came up with lots of good reasons why I should rather not go to gym. It was cold outside, It was getting late in the afternoon, there would be traffic at that time, yarra, yarra yarra.

There was a little monkey sitting on one shoulder telling me it was ok to have excuses and another monkey sitting on the other shoulder telling me how pathetic I was! Do you know the feeling?

Anyway, I did pluck up the energy and went and did an hour on the elliptical walker (commonly known as the cross trainer.)

When I was doing my session and trying to keep my mind occupied I thought a good topic of my next blog would be how to combat lethargy.

So here are some tips that could help you (and me) get our energy up.

1. DO SOMETHING THAT YOU ENJOY – give yourself some variety in your training. I find that if I am really feeling lazy, going to a class makes a difference, or calling someone and asking them to go to gym with me. It is amazing how energised I feel when there is somewhere there with me.
2. REMIND YOURSELF WHY YOU LIKE TO FEEL FIT – paste these reasons somewhere and and keep referring to them.
3. MAKE SURE YOU ARE GETTING ENOUGH SLEEP AT NIGHT - if you are serious about not being a couch potato ensure you are getting the right amount of sleep.
4. DON’T LISTEN TO YOUR EXCUSES – for every excuse you have, you can find a good reason to get on with it.
5. REMEMBER - THE LESS YOU DO, THE LESS YOU WANT TO DO.
6. MAKE SURE YOU ARE EATING CORRECTLY – inevitably when we are trying to get fit we cut down our food intake. Make sure you are eating the right sorts of food to give you energy. A big fat sandwich is not going to boost your energy levels.....
7. STAY HYDRATED – make sure you are drinking enough water through the day – not tea and coffee (lol).
8. DO THE SELF TALK & REMIND YOURSELF HOW GOOD YOU FEEL ONCE YOU HAVE DONE IT – if you are really battling go out with the intention of doing half of what you normally do – still MUCH better than nothing.
9. AT LEAST GET DRESSED.
A famous runner once said that when he don’t feel like going out for a run, he says to himself that all he will do is get ready and then decide. He gets dressed, puts on his takkies, heart rate monitor and running shorts. Then he makes the decision. 99% of the time he runs, as he feels a bit silly all dressed up and nowhere to go!
10. AS NIKE SAYS - JUST DO IT!

So, who is up for the challenge?

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This place called Earth is really so Small

2011-08-02T20:27:00.002+02:00

So today I started with a Social Media Coach who lives all the way on the other side of the world! I am in South Africa and Joy Bing Flemming lives in Charlotte, USA. It is absolutely mind boggling how easy it is to connect with people all over the world. Joy is like a breath of fresh air and it was such fun to spend an hour this evening working on Social Media presence and 'getting it out there'.

It also makes you realise how small the world is. You can literally talk to anyone, any where in the world. I find it incedibly exciting when I think of the possibility to connect with people from all walks of life and who, 10 years ago, you would never ever have an opportunity to hook up with.

I feel on such a buzz right now and feel very humbled to have the opportunities that we have at the moment. All it takes is a bit of dedication, a lot of authenticity, lots of caring and the world is your oyster.

Social Media is the way forward and if you would like to take your business to a new level, I can highly recommend Joy.

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE & OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

What are you waiting for?

2011-07-20T13:31:00.001+02:00

I don’t know about you, but I am finding, as I get older, (LOL) that time seems to be going so much quicker than before. Not sure if it is my age or if it is actually true, but that is a discussion for another time and place.

Each day it seems that I don’t do half the things I ought to get done. (Red flag, red flag – when I hear the ‘ought to, or need to’ words from my clients, I assume that they have not yet taken a decision ‘to do’. So as I write I realise that I need to practice what I preach and change the words I use.)

I realise that unless I plan what I am going to do each day, time passes and I find all sorts of things to keep me busy (not productive – big difference). We also know that we will spend our time doing things that are important to us – our values.

I listened to a very interesting video clip this morning by Dr John Demartini about values and wealth in particular. He was saying (and I hope I am remembering this correctly) that you will never ever have wealth unless it is in your top 3 values.

He quotes a story about a man who earned in the region of $62m in one year and at the end of the year he had to borrow a couple of thousand dollars to pay a tax bill! Then he speaks about another person earning $24000 in the same year and had managed to save more than what the first person needed to borrow.... Why? Because the 2nd person has wealth as one of their top values. She created opportunities to save her money instead of just spending.

"Living in agreement with one's values is fulfilling. Living in conflict with one's values is stressful and dissatisfying"

I hadn’t thought that wealth was a necessary value for me, but if I want to live a life of abundance, wealth certainly needs to be a value, doesn’t it? Certainly not the only value as there is much more to abundance than money.

So my challenge to you today is this:
Make a list of your top 5 values – this will take some time and effort if you haven't worked on this before.
Once you know what your values are, write down why you have chosen these values.
Then write down how having this value will positively impact your life.

Then, plan your day to feed into your values, e.g. if wealth is a value, what are you going to do, today, to contribute to that? (Set some financial goals, contact your clients, plan how much you intend to save,invest in some shares)
If love is a value, what are you going to do, today, to contribute to you experiencing love? (tell your partner you love them, contact a friend, spend time with your family)
If health is a value, what are you going to do, today, to contribute to that (go to the gym, have healthy meals, take on a personal trainer)
and so on and so on, (achievement, success, honesty, making a difference etc.)

I don't think that time will slow down as you work with your values, but at least you will be productively busy (lol).

So, what are you waiting for?

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Attitude

2011-07-13T08:39:00.001+02:00

"Excellence is not a skill - it is an attitude" Ralph Marston

I remember years ago when I was in recruitment, the head of a very large company was looking for staff and he said to me, don't bring me fancy cv's, bring me the person with the right attitude and I can train them on the skills. This was more than 20 years ago and I have never forgotton that.

As time goes on I am noticing, more and more, that the people with the right attitude are getting ahead. I am currently reading a book called the Difference Maker, by John C Maxwell and he syis that your attitude can be your greatest assest.

He also says that attitude cannot replace learning, but if there are two of you who have the same skills/knowledge but you are the one with the great attitude you will be the one that is chosen.

That is such great news! Why? Because we are solely responsible for our attitudes.

Steven Covey talks about the 90/10 principal. 10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react.

Now attitude, just like everything else in life, needs to be worked on constantly! If you work consciously on this, every single day, and keep checking in on how you are doing (maybe before you go to bed at night)this great new attitude will become 2nd nature. Do a quick check in on the events of the day and acknowledge the times that your attitude was GREAT and work on the instances where it needs an adjustment....

Who are the people you like interacting with? I bet you they are the ones with the GREAT ATTYITUDE. These people draw others to them. That is who I am going to be!

My mini goal today, is to have an awesome attitude with every single person I interact with, just for today. When I do my check-in tonight, I want to be able to say, just for today, I did well.

What are you prepared to commit to, just for today (LOL).

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Victor or Victim

2011-06-28T19:05:00.000+02:00

“Don't become a victim of yourself. Forget about the thief waiting in the alley; what about the thief in your mind?” John Rohn

One of my pet hates is to ever think that I may have a victim mentality! That is like waving a red flag at a bull. However, there are times when I go into victim mentality. Now my logic tells me that while I am 'playing the victim' I am not getting anywhere, but on the emtotional front I sometimes don't have control. Well that is another thought that scares me - giving over my power to someone else, because that is basically what happens when we are the 'victim.'

I guess that everyone goes into victim mode at some stage or another:
I didn't enjoy myself because the music was too loud
I couldn't get to gym because I was too tired
I am not happy because I don't have a partner
I can't have friends over because my house is too small
I am fat because all of my family are fat (lol)

Any of that sound familiar?

The point I am trying to make is that while we are justifying or laying blame who has the power? Certainly not you.

So how do we get ourselves out of this and why should we?
I would say that the minute we start taking responsibility for what is going on in our lives, we can climb out of 'victim' hole. In just about every situation we can change our point of view. Even if something terrible has happened to you, you should allow yourself the time to mourn the event, but then you have the choice to move on with your life and become the Victor.

It reminds me of the story of a lady who was horribly attacked. She was on the very brink of death. She was left for dead in the middle of nowhere. She decided that she wanted to live. She crawled to the main road to get help and survived the ordeal (not quite as simple as that) but the fact is that she survived.

She had a choice - Victim or Victor? She chose to be the Victor. I am very sure that it wasn't the easiest choice, but it was HER choice. Today she is a shining example, to thousands of people, of taking back control of her own life.

Why should we? Well that is up to you isn't it?

“Nobody ever did, or ever will, escape the consequences of his choices.” Alfred Montepert

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Are you part of the Majority?

2011-06-11T09:11:00.000+02:00

Before success comes in any man's life, he's sure to meet with much temporary defeat and, perhaps some failures. When defeat overtakes a man, the easiest and the most logical thing to do is to quit. That's exactly what the majority of men do.
Napoleon Hill

Just loved this one.
Do you have such a strong success belief that any setback is just that, a setback? Or, are you just going with the flow and being part of the majority?

Spend some time, this week, thinking about what you would really like to achieve. Get in in your mind that IT IS POSSIBLE and then don't let anyone deter you! As you know, there will be setbacks, but your reaction to the setback is what makes all the difference. If you know, without any doubt, that is what you are going after, you WILL get there. Just believe it and don't stray off the path to your success. If you do, not serious, just jump back on as soon as you can.

I know what I want out of life. Do you?

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE & OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

What is your Relationship with Money

2011-05-31T08:39:00.001+02:00

I am reading a brilliant book which is co-authored by Napoleon Hill called 'The Science of getting Rich'. This book is really transforming my thinking.

I have always had such a strange relationship with money. It is something that I don't like to talk about, it is something that I really can't ask for, and it is something that I have never been able to dream about. When I had to visualise a better life, or my perfect day, the dream was always very small.

When I was growing up, rich was a rude word, it was often used in the same sentence as selfish, self centred, etc. What a lot of nonsense! I don't know where that came from and there is no-one to blame, but that was my framework and it has taken me 50 years to re-think it. I had this feeling that if you were rich, you didn't care about others...

I have thought so much, since starting this book, about my relationship with money and as of last week, this relationship has changed. (Not changing, has changed :-))

So, what have I have learned?
I have learned that if I am rich I can be an example to others that it can be done
I have learned that I can be rich, without taking away from others
I have learned that if I am rich I can enable others
I have learned that I can be rich AND happy
I have learned that money is NOT the root of all evil, but can be the path to wonderful sharing and giving
I have learned that to want money, for money sake is not what I want

So, what is your relationship with money and what will you do with your money?

When your desires are strong enough you will appear to possess superhuman powers to achieve. Napoleon Hill

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Energy Flows where the Mind Goes

2011-04-19T09:04:00.001+02:00

So here we are heading into Winter. Some of us LOVE it and some of us hate it, but whatever we think about it, it is!

Now we all know about Steven Covey's 90/10 principle. 10% of what happens to us we have no control over, but 90% of what happens to us we do have control over! I just love that concept. So what he is saying is that if we change our attitude to the 90% that we had no control over, we could have a completely different outcome.

It is all in our attitude. If we are focusing on the cold weather and how miserable it makes us feel, all we do is keep reminding ourselves of the cold weather and how miserable it makes us feel. I tell my clients, often, whatever you are tuned in to is what you will experience. If you are tuned into Talk 702 you are NEVER going to hear Radio Five. In the same way, if you are tuned in the negative, you cannot hear the positive.

It is just a simple re-tuning. We need to take back control of our thoughts instead of letting them become ill disciplined little rascals. Find a way to change the track of your thoughts when they keep going into the space that you are not comfortable with (or shouldn't be comfortable with anyway!!). I use an elastic band on my arm and when my mind goes down that path, I snap it hard on my wrist and change the direction of the thought. Very soon your brain knows that if you are going into that thought pattern it will cause pain so it changes tack. You can then re-tune and hone in on what you do want to experience. Have a positive affirmation ready to use straight after the sting of the elastic (lol). Here are some examples:

My life is full of joy and happiness
I LOVE every day of my life
I consciously choose hope, joy and peace in my daily life.
I am now choosing a new optimistic attitude about myself, my life and my future.
I know that I have all the talent and resources I need to magnetize all that I desire
I know what I want. I know that it is available and I am excited about the bright future that I am creating for myself even now
I know that the Universe is abundant; all that I desire is available to me.

Really very simple, the hardest thing is to remind yourelf not to let the negatives take over your mind

Just try it. What do you have to lose?
Let me know how it works for you

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What is holding you back?

2011-04-13T17:34:00.000+02:00

You must do the thing which you think you cannot do. -Eleanor Roosevelt

This is so apt for me today.

Today Jay organised for me to join him on an advanced BMW driver training course. I am absolutely amazed at what I acheived in the car today! When the instructor was saying to me 'put your foot flat' I wanted to ask him what he was smoking!!! But I did it and am still here to tell the story! Now believe me, I am not the Michael Schumaker of Sunny South Africa, but today I felt like a world champion. Was I the fastest in the class? Absolutely not. Was I the most skilled? Absolutely not. It that important? Absolutely not!!!

What is important, is that I took myself to my limits in that great big X5M! We spent the day at the race track and it is the first time I have ever driven on the track and as the morning progressed I gained more confidence in myself and the vehicle.

So, why am I telling you this? Not to say what a clever girl I am (LOL) but today I had such an AHA moment. It is the first time that I have ever had a stranger sitting next to me, guiding me and believing in me and guess what? I stepped up to the plate just because of that.

Now isn't that exactly what coaching is all about? It is about your coach trusting and have implicit faith that you can achieve what you set your heart to do. I loved every minute of it and I think you would love every minute of having a coach that could do the same for you.

So, read the quote above and go out and do what you think you cannot do!!

I know that my limitations are my belief in self and sometimes you just need someone to be sitting next to you telling you to PUT YOUR FOOT FLAT!!!

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Looking Forward

2011-04-06T14:27:00.000+02:00

"It isn't where you came from; it's where you're going that counts."
Ella Fitzgerald

This is a very short post today! This quote is exactly what coaching is all about. In a coaching relationship we do not dwell on the past or where you have been, but on the future and where you want to be!

I will walk the path with you, help, nurture and encourage you to achieve what YOU want to achieve. Don't worry about the past or where you came from as there is nothing you can do about it!

Contact me and let's start the wonderful journey of coaching.....

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE & OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

The effect of your words

2011-04-03T17:00:00.001+02:00

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
Mother Teresa

It is so strange how a topic for the blog just appears! I was looking for a quote to post today and the one by Mother Teresa popped up. This got me thinking about kind words. I went to a workshop a while ago and learned this phrase:

Say what you mean,
Mean what you say,
But don't be mean about it.

Every single person that I have coached will laugh when they read this, because they have all heard it from me, at one time or another.

I am a firm believer in speaking your truth. I often get asked the question : "But what if speaking your truth hurts the other person?"

That can be tricky but if you remember to always leave the other person with their dignity, it is much easier. Remember that even when you are being kind, what comes out of your mouth and what lands in the other persons ear, can be miles and miles apart. Strange but true.

I can hear the next question, but how do you do that? Well there are a couple of basic rules in this kind of conversation. Remember to keep you eye on the ball and not the player.

Another thing to remember is that you don't always HAVE to give your opinion about something. How often do you rush in with your truth, when in fact you weren't even asked for your opinion? If it isn't your business, then stay away from it!

So apart from speaking your truth and doing it in a way that leaves the other person with their dignity, what about spending this week trying to find kind things to say to everyone around you! Seems like a tall order and I am not asking that you make up things to say but to rather look for the good in the situation.

Do you only say kind things when someone is in trouble, or is it part of your nature to notice the good in others and to offer kind words often.

My goal for this week is to be kind and to say kind words to EVERYONE that I come in touch with. Even if it is just noticing the name badge on the lady at the till and thanking her by name when she gives me my change. Or telling the person, by name, to have a great day. All those 'nameless' people out there who serve us day in and day out and whom I hardly even notice.

Can you do the same this week? Go on, I am throwing you a challenge!

Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end - Scott Adams

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Can people trust your word?

2011-03-24T08:27:00.000+02:00

A promise is a cloud; fulfillment is rain. Arabian Proverb

Ok so that probably got your back up (lol).

So once you have calmed down, let's chat about the topic of integrity.

This has always been a topic close to my heart. When I do a value's session with my client almost always Integrity is a value, and nothing wrong with that. However, the interesting part is that Integrity means something different to every single person.

One of the definitions of integrity is "The quality of always behaving according to the moral principles that you believe in, so that people respect and trust you"

What makes someone trust you? Is it just behaving according to your moral principles or is it more?

What about just keeping your word?
If you agree to call someone to set up a date, do you do it?
If you say you will do something, do you do it?
If you agree to a time to meet, are you there on time?
If someone sends you an sms, do you answer it? (Obviously I am talking about your 'trusted' friends)
If someone sends you an emal do you reply?(Obviously I am talking about your 'trusted' friends.

If you can answer yes to all of the above, then clearly people can trust your word and they probably have great respect for you! Well done!

If not, maybe you need to look at who is in your trusted circle and then ask yourself "Am I giving them the respect they are due?" If not, either you don't think they are that important to you, or you need to shape up.

How about keeping your word to yourself? Do you act in integrity with self? Now that is another whole topic for discussion.

Here is a lovely quote to end this blog....

Few delights can equal the mere presence of one whom we trust utterly. George MacDonald

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Self Worth

2011-03-16T06:54:00.000+02:00

"Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are." - Malcolm Forbes

In my coaching practice I often ask my clients to write out 20 things that they are good at or like about themselves. Do you know how many people can't come up with more than 5 - 6? However, conversely if I ask them to write up a list of things they don't like about themselves they can produce a fairly long list, quite easily. Now isn't that strange?

Now if that same person went to a friend and asked them to list the 20 things that are endearing or make them a good friend/wife/mother/husband the friend would rattle them off very easily.

So I suppose it boils down to the value that we give to ourselves. I am willing to bet you that you would never be as harsh to a friend as you are on yourself. We think it is quite OK to beat ourselves up. But why should it be?

Good self esteem doesn't come from being harsh on yourself. You cannot value and respect others unless you first value and respect yourself. This doesn't mean that you must ignore the things that you don't like. If you don't like it, change it! Simple...

So, how do you start to value yourself?

Write out a list of 30 things that you are good at (if you can't come up 30 (and no less than that) ask you partner, your friends, your family, but come up with 30. When you write out your list write the words, "I am good at (cooking), I am good at keeping a peaceful home, I am good at...
and so on. Each time you read out "I am good at...." you remind yourself that there are many things that you are good at!

Read out this list, every single day, until these good thoughts about yourself become second nature. You will be sending great thoughts to the brain about yourself and automatically start liking who you are.

Another great little trick I use is the 'elastic band' method!(LOL) Put an elastic band on your wrist, a strong one please. Then every time you have a negative thought or are being hard on yourself pull the elastic band and let it go. Let me warn you that this is going to STING! But eventually your mind stops those thoughts because it knows that if it goes down that road, it will hurt. I have been using one for the past couple of weeks and it reminds me of how powerful it is. At the moment if I think the thought that was swirling around in my mind so often, I don't even need to pull the elastic band, I can feel the sting

I urge you to try it and I would love any feedback.

So, just for this week, let's work on appreciating our own unique value, let's start really loving ourselves and honouring our journey.

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Who do you see in the mirror?

2011-03-08T15:58:00.000+02:00

"A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror." -Ken Keyes

Isn't this something to get your head around? I sat here thinking about this quote for quite a while as it is sooooo true, but also sooooo scarey.

Other people are hostile - not me! (lol)
Other people are angry, rude, unhappy and they make me angry,rude, unhappy! (lol)

Do you remember when you first fell in love? The world was the most amazing place - ostensibly the only thing that changed was that you had a new partner but EVERYTHING felt good. You didn't mind the traffic, you didn't mind the queues, you didn't mind anything. I know that is the way it felt for me.

At the time, what you saw in the mirror was love, roses, happiness, feeling treasured, etc. etc. The mirror was reflecting your own outlook on life at that time. You didn't change anything except the way you behaved and reacted to your surroundings.

So back to the question - Who do you see in the mirror now? Do you see angst, anger, frustration, or do you see love, patience, respect?

Whatever you see is a manifestation of what is happening inside. So easy to change isn't it? Or is it?

Worth thinking about though!

I know who I want to see in the mirror so best I start changing my own outlook....

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Don't let the Past dictate your Future

2011-03-07T14:37:00.000+02:00

"You can't have a better tomorrow if you're thinking about yesterday." - Charles Kettering

Most of us who have had a bad experience, in anything, are very reluctant to try again. I work with many people who have had bad relationships in the past and are too nervous to go into a new one because it may fail again.

Imagine if you lived your whole life like that. Imagine if you never gave anything a second chance!

Never giving love a 2nd chance
Never applying for a new job
Never booking a great island holiday again, because the weather was bad the last time
Never re-doing your drivers’ license and having to rely on everyone else for the rest of your life
Never trying a new recipe
and the list can go on and on and on.

Sometimes, you just have to take the bull by the horns and try it again, a 2nd, 3rd or 4th time or until you get it right. Instead of shying away from 2nd chances maybe we need to embrace them knowing that each time we try something it takes us closer to achievement. Remember it is not how many times we fall but how many times we get up that is the true strength of character.

We all know the definition of insanity, but I am not asking you to be insane! (When you do the same thing over and over and expect a different result).

If you have tried and it didn’t work, see what you can do differently before you start again, i.e if you were very needy in your last relationship and that pushed the person away, work on what made you needy. Think carefully about what you are looking for and what you can add to a relationship and then try again.

If you went after a big job and never succeeded, analyse what you could have done differently and then try again.

Argus is coming up this weekend and I know of many, many people who did not finish the race the first time but went ahead the next year and tried all over again. Well done to them.

The Midmar Mile was in February and there are many people who finish the race just outside the time and don’t get the medal. Some of those people never ever try the race again and for others, it just makes them even more determined.

What is your modus operandi when you don’t achieve the first time. Is it ‘woe is me’ or determination to do better next time?

My challenge to you today is to put fear of failure out the window and try again!

If you are battling with this, you know what to do! Contact me and I will get your started.....

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Energy

2011-03-03T14:51:00.001+02:00

Energy is a funny thing. Sometimes I feel as though I could fly to the moon and other days I feel as though I don’t have enough energy to get up in the morning. This got me thinking about what gives me energy

I feel energised when:
• I am with people who make me laugh
• I am coaching
• I am reading good material’
• I have just been to gym (strange but true, you have just worked yourself to a standstill, but yet you feel energised)
• I am on holiday (isn’t it amazing that normally when the alarm goes off in the morning you wish you could just sleep in for another 10 minutes, but when you are on holiday you don’t need the alarm to wake you – hmmm wonder what that is all about)
• I am exploring my belief system
• I am helping others to solve a dilemma
• I am able to give people a different perspective on their issues
• I am out Cycling
• I see a good movie

This is awesome because these are all things that I CAN do on a daily basis and I now know how to ‘chase’ the energy if I am low on it.

So my challenge to you is this. Write out a list of all the things that lift your energy. See how many of those things you are doing regularly and if you are not doing them often enough, then sharpen up and get moving. Movement gives you energy!

I am now going to write out a list of things that drain my energy and then work on ways to eliminate those things/people/activities from my life (as far as possible... don’t want to actually eliminate anyone, just not spend time with them!)

I am excellent at assisting you with actions to take to sharpen up!

Happiness is somebody to love, Something to do, And something to hope for. ~ Chinese Proverb

and ......... Happiness gives you energy!

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Discouraged?

2011-03-02T11:13:00.000+02:00

"Ninety percent of all those who fail are not actually defeated. They simply quit."
- Paul J. Meyer

Whew this came at me like a Tsunami. When things get tough it is so easy to get disheartened and give up. I am hearing a lot of this, even so early in the year and I know the feeling. If we quit, we will never know what 'could have been'. I suppose the secret is to know when to put in more effort and try new ideas and when to call it quits. Somewhere I read once that 99% (or some figure like that) of people give up about 5 minutes (or something like that (lol) before they become a success.

OK, so what do you need to do to keep the energy up and persevere at what you are doing. Deep down we all know what is right and good for us but we are inclined to lose faith when it gets too hard, for too long.

Where can you find the strength to carry on?
Do you have someone who will be honest and truthful with you, with no ulterior motive?
Do you have a spiritual/financial/religious adviser
Do you have a good support system.
Do you have people you can 'unload' on.
Do you have someone to brainstorm with?
Do you have someone to share your ideas with?

If not, give me a call and I will coach you through your process.

Just loved this little quote ..... makes you think!

“Optimism is the cheerful frame of mind that enables a teakettle to sing, though in hot water up to its nose.”

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Busy or Productive

2011-03-02T10:54:00.000+02:00

I saw a quote today that got me thinking. Do I spend my time being busy (my ex coach asked me this question once and I thought she was being quite cheeky (lol)) or do I spend my time being productive.

Do I want to get to bed at the end of the day being exhausted because I have done so much or do I want to get to bed exhausted because I have achieved so much? (Because, in my mind, if you don't get to bed exhausted, you are going to bed too early).

That got me thinking that when I am exhausted because I have achieved I have a really good night's rest but when I have just been busy I don't sleep that well.

So I suppose the question is this "how do I know the diference?"

For me the difference is that if you have a plan or a goal, then you can measure your acheivement. If not, then you are just busy....

What do you think? This will be posted on my Facebook page, so I would love to hear your thoughts via Facebook.

Here is the quote that started me off today.
"Determine never to be idle. It is wonderful how much may be done if we are always doing." Thomas Jefferson

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Are you Moving Forward

2011-02-24T07:52:00.001+02:00

"If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's. And guess what they might have planned for you? Not much."
-- Jim Rohn

It is such an age such an age since I wrote to my dear friend Blog (lol).
It seems as though this year has gotten off to quite a start as February is almost over. How did that happen so quickly?

Did you know that if you are not working towards your own goals, you are helping someone else achieve theirs? Does that make sense? Unless you know where you want to go, you will go wherever the road takes you.

Call me and let's start working on your own goals, plans and aspirations. Let's find something to blow your hair back, find the inner child and hence re-create the fun in life.... how cool does that sound!

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Actions to Live by

2011-02-18T09:32:00.002+02:00

This is an excerpt of something sent to me by my daughter-in-law and although it is nothing new, it is definitely worth reading, registering and then actioning!

I hope you enjoy this as much as I did.

By Regina Brett
• Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
• When in doubt, just take the next small step
• Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
• Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does
• You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree
• Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
• Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
• If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
• Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
• When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
• Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
• Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
• No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
• What other people think of you is none of your business.
• However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
• Growing old beats the alternative – dying young.
• If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
• Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
• Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift..

Have a great weekend!

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Insanity

2011-01-20T16:35:00.001+02:00

I believe the definition of insanity is when you keep doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Do you recognise that?

So the quote below makes such sense!

"The happiness of most people we know is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slowly destructive little things."
-- Ernest Dimnet

If something is not working for you, you need to change the direction, habit, though patterns, etc.etc. Because if you don't you could be considered insane. Now there's a thought!!

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Success

2011-01-13T14:51:00.002+02:00

What does success mean to you?
Does it mean wealth?
Does it mean having nice things, driving nice cars?
Does it mean having good relationships?
Does it mean giving to the community?
Does it mean being able to travel?
Does it mean being healthy?

Success means different things to different people.

It doesn't really matter what success means to you, but what does matter is that you know what you are striving for, be it big or small.

Have you started on your success path this year? If not, give me a shout and let's get going

"I know the price of success: dedication, hard work and an unremitting devotion to the things you want to see happen." - Frank Lloyd Wright

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Get Started

2011-01-12T08:16:00.001+02:00

How often we put off starting something because we don't know where to start, or we are not sure if we can do it, or we don't know if we will do it properly, or we want it to be perfect first time round!

Does any of the above apply to you? I know it certainly does apply to me...

I thought that this quote hit the nail on the head!

"Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly - until you learn to do it well."
Steve Brown

What does that say to you? To me it says just get started, it may not be right, it may not be 100% but at least it will be something.

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GOALS

2011-01-11T11:29:00.001+02:00

"Until you commit your goals to paper, you have intentions that are seeds without soil."
-- Anonymous

My oh my is this true! If you don't commit and then work towards the commitment it is just another thing that has failed.

How many of you made New Years Resolutions on the 31st of December and have kept them?

Do you do this every year?
Do you manage to achieve them or do they eventually end up in file 13?
Do you tell others of your intentions? This always helps to keep you on track.....

We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.” By Edith Lovejoy Pierce

Do you need help on those goals? I know an excellent Life Coach :-)

Contact me on bev@developmentcoach.co.za

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IF IT DOESN'T SERVE YOU, LET IT GO

2011-01-10T21:32:00.001+02:00

Excerpt from a Flash of Inspiration - Orange Peel Systems

How often do you let something that happened, or something someone said influence your whole mood? If you are like most people, then this happens more often than you would probably like. It is so easy to get upset, angry or frustrated by the fact that someone is not calling you, by a small remark or something happening during your day. These kind of negative feelings are relatively strong and can therefore really spoil your day if you let them. Yes, if YOU let them, because you still always have a choice as to how you respond to the matter.

When you think about, each day many many wonderful, positive things happen to us continuously that can be acknowledged. We may wake up next to the one we love, we can take a shower, eat breakfast, hug our kids, step in our car, drink a noce tea or coffee, and so on. each moment can be seen as a blessing if you choose to.
So why spoil all these positive moments with a few negative ones? My suggestion therefore is to be really conscious of the effect things have on you, and if you feel upset, just think for a moment...

Is this really worth spoiling my wonderful day for? What purpose does it have to continue to generate these negative feelings? Does this feeling serve me at all? How would I rather feel?

Then say to yourself "I will let this go for the sake of feeling great!"
You see, it doesn't matter whether you are right, or you feel someone did you wrong, this is about you feeling good and happy. Give it a try, and I hope it will make you feel more positive and in charge of your emotions!

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AHEAD OF THE GAME

2011-01-07T08:49:00.001+02:00

"Only those who constantly retool themselves stand a chance of staying employed in the years ahead."
Tom Peters

What do you want to do this year that will necessitate you 'retooling' yourself.

Have you got your eye on a promotion?
Have you set your sights on a course you may want to do?
Have you got things that you can teach others to retool them?
Do you need to spend some time strategizing and planning the year ahead?
Are you ready to step up to the plate?

Now is a good time to contact me to discuss coaching and 'Going for Gold' in 2011

Contact me via my website or bev@developmentcoach.co.za

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http://developmentcoach.co.za

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

2011-01-06T12:39:00.000+02:00

"No matter how small, acknowledge the achievement" - Greg Henry Quinn

Happy New Year to everyone out there. I have a feeling in my bones that 2011 is going to be GREAT.

I think a great way to start this year would be to do things slightly differently! So instead of just looking at what we would like to achieve this year and what goals we are can set for ourselves, why don't we acknowledge ourselves, and those dear to us, for what we did last year?

I urge you to write a list of 15 things that you did well last year, be they big or small and then acknowledge them. Don't dwell on the disappointments but acknowledge what went well.

Why not make the decision that this year you will live in an Attitude of Gratitude?

I hope that you continue to stay in touch with me in 2011 and that together we can do great things.

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Live it Laugh It!

2010-12-27T06:58:00.000+02:00

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DIGNITY

2010-12-27T06:57:00.000+02:00

"One's dignity may be assaulted, vandalized and cruelly mocked, but it cannot be taken away unless it is surrendered. "
-- Michael J Fox

This quote really made me think. I looked up 'dignity' and one of the meanings is: "Respect people have for you. Respect that other people have for you or that you have for yourself"

My question is this: Does your dignity depend on the way you treat others, the way others treat you, or the way you behave? Interesting.

I look on Facebook and see the things that people post when they are angry, annoyed or irritated with others. Are they showing dignity when they post comments for the world to see? I think not.......

I will try and maintain my dignity at all times? Will you do the same?

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FOCUS

2010-12-19T06:15:00.000+02:00

By focusing on your choices, and then making them with integrity, you control your commitment - John C Maxwell

It is 5am on Sunday morning and the sun is shining and the skies are absolutely sparkling, as they should be after so many days of non-stop rain. I woke up feeling rearing to go and even considered doing another cycle ride today, but three days in a row after a 9 year cycling sabbatical was not going to work! I did a 45km cycle yesterday, which is a relatively short ride, but there were so many hills and I was finished....

Anyway I was wondering what I could blog about today and picked up three different pieces of material which I normally look to for inspiration and EVERY one of them was on Focus......

So, for me I think the 'focus' thing is to stop focusing on the wrong things, i.e. the things that are not working or that you are worrying about as all you do is bring more of that into your life! We all know that where we place our energy is what we get more of. I have SO MUCH to be grateful for, and every single day I thank the universe for all that is good in my life but I do still also think about things that are not that great.

I find that it is easier to focus on something if you only have to do it for a short while so :

Just for today I will not anger
Just for today I will not worry
Just for today I will love and respect every living thing
Just for today I will do my work honestly
Just for today I will live an attitude of Gratitude

(These are the Reiki principles and they are great)

See if you can focus on the above, Just for today :-)

Have a stunning sunday.

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Right here

2010-12-08T06:12:00.000+02:00

You are right where you should be at this moment. Now it is
time to move on to what is next.

Whether your life up to this point has been easy or whether
it has been difficult, you are here just the same. And your
destiny does not care about your past.

There are plenty of reasons why you find yourself here at
this time. What matter much more, though, are the reasons
you now have for moving forward.

As good as they have been, your triumphs of the past are now
little more than pleasant memories. As painful as they once
were, your past failures are now behind you.

Do you realize how completely free you are at this very
moment? Do you understand that the main thing holding you
back is your belief that something is holding you back?

Today is your opportunity to fully taste that freedom and to
finally get beyond the limits you've imposed on yourself.
Reach inside, touch your most compelling purpose, and bring
your best possibilities to life.

Ralph Marston

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HAPPINESS IS ....

2010-11-29T07:05:00.000+02:00

The glorious weather that we are having at the moment
Spending time with friends
Hearing my grandson laugh
Being able to get on my bicycle and go for a wonderful ride on the weekends
Getting an email from a friend
Seeing the personal growth in my clients
Laughing with the girls
Watching a sunset
Talking to my partner
That first cup of coffee in the morning
Having a bubble bath
Bumping into a friend who you haven't seen for 20 years
Planning a holiday
When a son phones and just wants to chat
Reading a good book
Getting home to the welcome from my ever loving dogs

I woke up this morning feeling happy and thought I would share!
Have a glorious week and CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY, because that is all it is, a CHOICE

What can you consciously make a decision to be happy about?

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Healthy Body, Healthy Mind

2010-11-22T08:28:00.000+02:00

We all know this saying don't we? When we are fit we agree with it and when we are being couch potatoes we ignore it!! That's the nature of the beast.

This weekend I got onto my road bicycle after about 8-9 years off the saddle, as I was encouraged by a friend to go and do a short ride with them. When I arrived I was told that they were cycling 40km (which is a long way when you have not ridden for such a long time!!) Anyway to cut a long story short I did the ride and LOVED EVERY MINUTE of it. I got off the bike in a wonderful frame of mind and all excited and fired up about cycling (at the tender age of 53 years old!).

What really hit home for me was that I was ready to tackle the world after the ride. I am not that 'up' on what happens to the body when you train, but I know that you release all sorts of endorphins (I think) and that makes you feel good.

I am not good at marketing, no I will refrain that, I did not used to be good at marketing, but when I returned home from the ride on Saturday, I just wanted to get onto the phone, in that GREAT frame of mind and tackle the marketing. Because we all know that even though people cannot see your expressions over the phone, they can certainly hear how you are feeling.

I also know that if you are on a 'high' that is when you should tackle anything that you feel is a challenge! Pity it was a Saturday and business was closed, because I guarantee I would have lined up stacks of appointments for this week!

What can you do, TODAY, to get your body to release those feel good endorphins and give you the oomph you need to face a challenge that you have been putting off! Go on, I dare you! (That is if there is anyone out there.... )

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Procrastination

2010-11-19T07:10:00.000+02:00

"Before you go to sleep at night ask yourself one question: Did you do every single thing you could today to make sure that you did your best? It’s hard to answer 'yes' every single day." - Apolo Ohno

That is all I wanted to post today!

Have a fabulous weekend

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE OR OVER THE TELPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Looking Forward

2010-11-17T11:21:00.000+02:00

"Most people are more satisfied with old problems than committed to finding new solutions" - John Maxwell

Just loved that quote today.

I have had a very interesting week, some of it really good and some not so good. It is quite a challenge to stay upbeat and energised when you are dealing with someone who is not prepared to make the necessary changes to become more fulfilled, achieve personal achievement and live a happier life! Come on guys, until you start to take responsibility for your situation you are not going to move. Imagine yourself in 5 years time if you are still in the same situation! However, imagine yourself in 5 years time if you have put in the effort now! The freedom, the new beginnings, the joy of leaving behind what didn't work in the first place?

Then I have worked with amazing people who are absolutely prepared to make the necessary changes. They are prepared to look inward and forward and move out of the past. There is nothing that you can do about 1 second ago, so why get hung up on the past.......?

So what game are you playing right now Poor Me, or Watch this Space?

Have an awesome weekend. Not even sure if anyone reads this blog, but it is good for me to write anyway.

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE OR OVER THE TELEPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Communication

2010-11-15T08:36:00.000+02:00

"Nothing in life is more important than the ability to communicate effectively." Gerald R. Ford

I was making notes from my coaching sessions last week and it dawned on me that almost every single session I have done over the last few weeks has been around communication.

How is your communication?

Are you a good listener, because listening is just a vital to communication as talking. Do you spend the whole time thinking about what you are going to say next, or do you listen before you start formulating your own response? I am very guilty of that and have to constantly work on listening (pity that is not one of the main subjects at school :-)).

I know that I am much quicker to send an sms than to pick up the phone. In this time of instant connectivity with emails, sms', bbm, etc. etc., we are losing the personal touch, and that is quite sad. I think that if you are making an arrangement email or sms is absolutely fine, but if you want a discussion then you need to pick up the phone!

A recent email of mine really upset a very dear friend. I have no doubt that the same content, spoken face to face, would have actually been quite funny, but as she could not pick up my frame of mind she took offence and I had to do some serious backtracking not to destroy the relationship completely.

The other thing about communication is not to always assume that the other person understands exactly what you are saying and if you are not sure what is being said then clarify.......

I have decided to concentrate on great communication this week.

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Words to delete from your vocabulary

2010-11-09T08:51:00.000+02:00

OK, so here is some fun for today (just for today makes it so much more achievable)

My challenge to you is to go through the entire day without using any of these self limiting words! Who is up for the challenge?

can't
but
should
maybe
sooner or later
someday
never
won’t
if
try or I'll try

Enjoy

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE OR OVER THE TELPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Speak Your Truth

2010-11-08T14:07:00.000+02:00

Sometimes speaking your truth can be the hardest thing ever!

I had an incident last week where a young person came to see me for confidence and self esteem issues. I felt that we had had a great session and that Coaching would absolutely serve her. I then had a call from an older relative saying that maybe they should look at therapy first and then coaching.

It is not in my nature to try and talk people out of therapy and I didn't try and do it during the call. But as the day wore on I was thinking that I really need to speak my truth. I learned a saying, many years ago that goes like this:

Say what you mean
Mean what you say
But, don't be mean about it

I reminded myself of this and then made the call back to the relative to say that I needed to speak my truth (as difficult as it was). I had a lovely conversation with the relative but felt, at the end of it, that I had may have hit some home truths and that person was hurting. I had also needed to remind that person that maybe it was time for them to step back and allow the 'child' to gain confidence and self esteem by being allowed/encouraged to make their own decisions! I am a parent and I know how difficult that is, but one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is independence......

I use the above example to illustrate how difficult it can be and then ask 'when should you speak your truth and when should you keep quiet?'.

My answer would be, if you are acting in integrity (and as a Development Coach, that particular discussion was acting in integrity) and you have pure motive, then you need to speak your truth, no matter how difficult it may be.

What are your thoughts on this?

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE OR OVER THE TELPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Are you just existing or are you enjoying life?

2010-11-03T12:03:00.000+02:00

When was the last time you did something for the first time?

I read this somewhere and thought, whew I have to think about that. Apart from travelling to a new country recently, I can't remember when I did something for the first time. OK, so at my age, I don't suppose this is so unusual, but what if we were to consciously go out there and look for something new to do, or try, or read?

We were walking along the river front in Singapore looking at all the restaurants and they had a giant catapault contraption there. We stood watching these people be shot into the air at an incredible rate, and then the capsule turns and turns on the way down and everyone is screaming their heads off. Jay, who is a speed freak said he could never do something like that (yet he races a very fast car at great speed). I thought I wouldn't mind trying it but never got the chance and maybe I am a little bit relieved about that.

My point is, should we not be consciously out there looking for something new to try? Are we just going along, day in and day out, existing or are we out there enjoying the journey?

Why don't you set yourself a challenge to try something new today? Maybe a new food, a new gym class or a new exercise?

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE OR OVER THE TELPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Blogging

2010-11-02T11:41:00.000+02:00

Ok, so I have been working with an e-marketing person who has said that blogging is the way to go and that I need to do more of it. It is the way of the future. He suggested that I get the movied Julie and Julia to see how blogging worked for her.

This led to such an interesting conversation! I mentioned at lunch on Sunday that I was going to watch the movie as it was all about blogging and a huge debate ensued from the people around the table. One lady thought that the entire movie was about cooking and her young daughters said the movie was about blogging.

So, I watched it last night and I think they were both right!!

Isn't it absolutely amazing how we can be at the same movie, or in the same conversation and have completely different ideas about what was going on.

Makes you think doesn't it! Everyone's brain is wired differently and what we think we see or hear, is all based on our own frame of reference....

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Winners

2010-11-01T16:35:00.000+02:00

What separates the winners from the losers is how a person reacts to each new twist of fate.
Donald Trump

Just love this quote. I was at the US Embassy applying for a VISA and it was such an eye opener to see the different attitudes of people waiting (for hours) to have their interview. As we all know, you have all sorts of things to do BEFORE you can even apply for an interview, then you get the interview time, only to find that there are 50 other people with the same interview time and only 3 people processing the applications...... and then you watch the people.

- Some are bemoaning their fate
- Some have taken the opportunity to meet a stranger
- Some are sitting there in an absolute state of nerves

But everyone has made a choice as to how they will wait (either consciously or sub consciously)!!

It reminded me of Stephen Covey's 90/10 principle wherein he talks about 10% of what happens is out of your control but the other 90% depends on your reaction!

Nice food for thought!

INTERNATIONALLY I COACH PEOPLE VIA SKYPE OR, FACE-TO-FACE OR OVER THE TELPHONE IN SOUTH AFRICA. EMAIL ME FOR A COMPLIMENTARY COACHING SESSION, NO MATTER WHERE IN THE WORLD YOU ARE......

Growth takes place while you are uncomfortable

2010-10-30T09:34:00.000+02:00

One of the things that I have always felt uncomfortable about is public speaking. Put me in a room full of people I don't know and I am over the moon! Put me IN FRONT of people and I am right out of my comfort zone.

But all of my work is based around explaining how there is no growth while you are comfortable! How ironic is that?

This morning I got an invite to do a talk out in the Magaliesburg and my first reaction was NO, I don't do public speaking. Then I thought, if I was coaching myself, what would I be telling me.......

So, I have accepted the engagement to speak to a group as I need to practice what I preach!

I would love to hear where you have experienced growth while being uncomfortable.

Have a fabulous saturday.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Make Listening part of your Agenda

2010-10-29T08:27:00.000+02:00

“The more I respect the wisdom of the person, the more listening is part of my agenda” – John C Maxwell

When I read this quote this morning I had an ‘aha’ moment!! If you are anything like me, while I am communicating with someone, I am so busy thinking about what to say next that I often forget to listen. Isn’t this an age old story, for most of us.
I have decided that just for today (then it doesn’t seem to daunting) I am going to see everyone that I talk to as wise and make listening part of my agenda!
Have a great weekend.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Expect more

2010-10-05T08:44:00.001+02:00

This is already a wonderful day. Expect it to get even
better.

There are many interesting and useful things you already
know. Expect to learn even more.

You've successfully navigated through every past challenge.
Expect to reap even greater success from the challenges you
now face.

There is already great value in your life and in your world.
Expect to create even more.

As good as life is, you can make it even richer and more
fulfilling. Expect to move forward today and you'll find a
way, no matter what, to make real progress.

If you knew without a doubt that you would get what you
expect, what would you expect? Truly expect the best of
today and you'll find those expectations leading you
steadily forward.

by Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

DANCING WITH GOD

2010-08-30T18:00:00.001+02:00

Cradled in his arms
It was a slow dance at first
Welcomed by the Universe
It was the dance of my birth

As the years went by
I could feel his hand in mine
Could hear his soft whispers
Sharing all that was Divine

Felt his encouraging rhythm
Sometimes quick sometimes slow
Felt beautifully at one with him
With him was in my flow

But then there were other times
When I would lose my step and lose my way
Our dance was out of sync
And I would off my true path stray

There were times when I would stumble
And forgot all that was my essence
But even throughout these times
I could always feel his presence

He would gently pick me up
Guide me back to the start
To the place where all my dreams begin
The ones that dwell within my heart

Got back into his rhythm
This is my rhythm too
His dance is my dance
A dance that is so true

I am dancing with God
And he is dancing with me
It’s elegant and effortless
In our dance I am free

Georgina Laros
August 2010

This poem was written by a very good friend of mine and it is just too beautiful not to share!

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

In a great place

2010-07-28T15:04:00.000+03:00

Instead of placing judgments on where you find yourself, consider the positive possibilities. Instead of extending
assumptions out from your limitations, imagine your most treasured dreams extending out from your current situation.

If you feel stuck where you are, you're mistaken. Anything is possible, when you engage the power of your imagination.

The things that have already happened can give you some useful insight and perspective. Yet your future is whatever
you choose right now to make it.

You don't have to be magically transported away from where you are in order to experience fulfillment. You can begin
making your way forward from wherever you may be, in whatever direction you choose.

It's easy to blame your circumstances for holding you back. It's much more powerful, though, to accept those
circumstances and begin working with the value they offer.

You're in a great place, because from where you are you can go anywhere. Look around, with positive expectations, and
step forward in the direction of your dreams.

Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE
Contact me for a free session on Skype and let's get going on your turning your dreams into reality

Influence or Authority

2010-06-21T12:48:00.000+03:00

"The key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority."
-- Kenneth Blanchard

I came across this quote today and it just resonated with me so well. This is probably because this is something that we all need to be aware of. Certainly I do! It got me thinking about all the people that we deal with on a daily basis where we try and use authority instead of influence! Whew, quite a lot to think about.

We all know the benefits of getting people to think differently rather than telling them what to do, don't we??

As a Coach I do not have authority over anyone else's life but I do have the ability to get people to think differently and thereby maybe influencing them....

Have a wonderful day.

Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Johannesburg 9th June Fifa World Cup

2010-06-09T16:01:00.000+03:00

This is what we do well!

So proud to be a South African!

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Just like you expect

2010-05-26T13:44:00.003+03:00

When you are prepared to find fault, you will. When you are
prepared to find goodness and value, you will.

What you are looking for determines what you find. What you
are expecting determines what you experience.

Expectations don't magically change reality. Expectations do
something even more powerful -- they change the way you deal
with reality.

Is this going to be a positive, productive day or a
disappointing, frustrating one? What do you expect?

The great thing is that you can expect whatever you choose
to expect. And though the specific details won't always
match your expectations, the overall tone of the day will be
just like you most sincerely expect.

Expect the best. Proceed under the assumption that you'll
get the best, from yourself and others, and you're well on
your way to getting it.

Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Just like you expect

2010-05-26T13:44:00.001+03:00

Good Idea?

2010-05-20T15:34:00.000+03:00

Hello again,

It is a long time since I last posted anything on my blog, so sorry for the absence but there has been a lot happening in my life. I am now a very proud Granny and a very Proud Mother in Law. One son got married and the other one (well his partner) had a baby, so 2010 has been an awesome year so far!

I came across this quote by Thomas Edison "The value of a good idea is in using it" and I thought it was worth talking about as it is so relevant to coaching. We are taught as coaches that when our clients have an insight, we must get them to act on it immediately. If you don't you either lose the idea or lose the urge to act on it.

Can you relate to that?

So my challenge to you today is to think about any ideas that you may have had and not acted on, and just do it! Who knows, we could be reading about you in Fortune 500 if your idea works ...... wouldn't that be great?

Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

My Grandson

2010-05-03T22:30:00.000+03:00

I have been feeling very guilty that I did not send out any communication in April, but truth be told, I could not focus on anything other than the birth of my grandson, Murray, who came into this world on the 21st of April and has had a tough journey.

Even though we knew that he had a problem (which was completely correctible), and that he would be in ICU for 4 – 6 weeks, nothing prepares you for this journey and the miracle of modern medicine. I sit and stare at his photo’s and the videos that the kids have done for me, over and over and just thank the Universe that this little soul is doing so well and coping with everything that has been thrown his way. He is a little fighter and too cute for words. It is very hard to explain the love that I feel for this baby who, by the way, is the cutest baby in the whole world!

I have been overwhelmed by the people who have supported us through this time with offers of prayers and energy healing and I must say, it looks as though all the support has certainly worked, as Murray is doing extremely well. So a big thanks to everyone.

I also realised how much I was stressing about something that I had no control over. This is something that I preach about. If there is nothing that you can do about it, then stop worrying, because worrying is not going to help anyone, yourself included. My, oh my, but how much easier this is said than done.

So now we look forward to him coming home and enriching our lives with the joy and innocence of a baby!

Namaste'
Bev

WOMENS DAY WISH

2010-03-08T07:57:00.000+02:00

A Goddess you are

Mother or Daughter
Sisters of birth
Grandmother or Aunt
All women on earth

If just for one day
You believe that you are
A Goddess of Love
Your own beautiful Star

Then this is the day
To shine your own light
Feel the Goddess within
With all women unite

Walk tall, walk proud
Feel your beauty within
Share your light with the world
We are one, we are kin

For a Goddess you are
And forever will be
Women’s day or any other
In us all we this see

Georgina Laros
8 February 2010

This was written by a very dear friend of mine and I just had to post it.
Thanks G.

So, got out today and be, enjoy and feel like the Goddess you are.
Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

What do you want to acheive this year

2010-01-26T11:17:00.000+02:00

Hi there,

As we start another year actually just more than 11 months left to the end of the year (LOL) it is the time to sit down and think about what we would like to achieve this year. Have you given any thought to where you would like to be at the end of the year and how this would make you feel?

If not, here are some things to think about:

1. What projects or changes do you want to achieve this year?

2. What are the constraints that could prevent you from achieving this?

3. What habits do you need to change to ensure better achievement of the above?

4. What price are you willing to pay in order to achieve victory?

5. Are you actively pursuing what's most important on a daily basis?

6. What is the biggest unsolved problem in your life that requires a solution?

If you need any help on this please contact me, via the website to set up a free introduction to Life Coaching session.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Turn around

2010-01-18T16:27:00.000+02:00

When you discover that you're feeling negative, you have two choices. You can feel even more negative about the fact that you're feeling negative, or you can choose to turn your thoughts around.

When you've suffered a defeat, you can make it even worse by beating yourself up about it. Or, you can use it as a positive inspiration to turn yourself around and move forward in a more effective way.

The moment you realize you've strayed from the path, use that realization as a clear and compelling signal. Use it as a signal that it's time to re-commit to the original goal and get yourself back on track.

Sure, it's unfortunate that you've temporarily lost your way. But there's no reason to add to that misfortune.

In this moment, you can choose any direction, no matter what has just happened. So choose a positive, empowering direction that will bring out the best in you.

This is your opportunity to act with renewed determination and purpose. Turn around, and get yourself going forward again.

by Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Letting it be

2010-01-14T17:42:00.001+02:00

Be at home where you are, wherever it might be. Be at peace
with what is happening, no matter what it is.

By all means change things for the better. Remember though,
to begin with where you are.

Instead of fighting against what is, put your energy into
creating the best of what can be. Instead of denying or
resenting what has been, put it to use in moving forward.

Put yourself in your most powerful state by fully accepting
the circumstances you're in. Join in the flow of life's
massive abundance by seeing what is and letting it be.

There is great goodness in this moment. Let go of judgment,
let go of anxiety, and see that goodness.

The power to do anything is present in this moment, in this
place. Let it be, as it is, and it will be yours.

Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

GOALS

2009-11-26T09:56:00.000+02:00

"YOUR GOAL SHOULD BE OUT OF REACH, BUT NOT OUT OF SIGHT"
-- Anita DeFrantz, Olympic rower

I just loved this quote and it is so pertinent to the work that I do. As you all know, Life Coaching is all about the client setting their goals and then we work together to achieve that goal.

I have found, through my coaching, that the people who give up half way through a programme are the ones who don't have nice juicy goals that are just out of reach! Not everyone aspires to some greater achievement, and that is absolutely fine, and your goal doesn't have to be something much bigger! It could be something very different.! Something that you have been wanting to try but maybe you just need a little push to get you there.

So, if there is something that you would LOVE to do, but don't know where to start, give me a shout and let's get going! 2010 is nearly here, let's plan to make it a fabulous year.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

EMPATHY

2009-11-11T12:36:00.000+02:00

I don't know how you are feeling at this time of the year, but my energy seems to be waning a bit. That is OK, because as a numerologist I know that at this time of the year we start shedding the energies of this year and start to bring in the energies for next year.

I see relationships going through a bit of a trying time. There are lots of people who can't seem to wait for this year to end in the hope that next year will be much, much better. Then we have our students who are trying to stay focussed and positive about the year end exams.

I was talking to a mom the other day about her son leaving school this year and she was telling me about how fearful he is about next year. ("Isn't that weird?" was my first thought!!)

Then I moved out of the judgemental me, and thought about where he is at right now. He has just finished Matric and has been at the same school since Grade 0. He has had the same set of friends for the last 12 - 13 years and next year they are all going to different Universities or Colleges. Some are taking a gap year and going overseas.

In my life, I have never thought that leaving school could cause you to be fearful! But when I took the time to go through this in my mind I realised just how frightening this could be. This kid is thinking about perceived losses, instead of loving the fact that he is going to be starting a new chapter in his life. And that is also OK.......

The wonderful thing about the chat is the fact that our boys are now talking to us!! YAY. They are able to verablise how they are feeling and not be embarrassed to say "Mom, I am really feeling very sad about perhaps losing touch with my friends". In my day I certainly didn't ever see boys speaking about their feelings like that. They just had to 'Take it like a man".

So I think the point about the blog today is to not just take everything at face value. Be aware of what people are going through and try and empathise.

We need be there for each other, where that 'there' is and whatever it takes, because the one thing you can be certain about is that at some stage or another, in your life, you will need someone to 'be there' for you.

Take care and remember that :

SMALL DEEDS DONE, ARE BETTER THAN GREAT DEEDS PLANNED

Namaste'

Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Symphony of Contentment

2009-11-09T10:23:00.003+02:00

Adapted from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Simple Living by Georgene Lockwood. .

TO LIVE CONTENT with small means.

TO SEEK ELEGANCE rather than luxury, and refinement rather than fashion.

TO BE WORTHY, not respectable and wealthy, not rich.

TO STUDY HARD, think quietly, talk gently, act frankly.

TO LISTEN TO STARS and birds, to babes and sages, with open heart.

TO BEAR ALL, cheerfully, do all bravely, await occasions, hurry never.

IN A WORD, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious, grow up through the common.

This is to be my symphony. By William Henry Channing, Chaplain in the Civil War via Alice Gray, Steve Stephens and John Van Diest in Lists to Live By, the Third Collection

Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

MOVING FORWARD

2009-10-22T09:21:00.000+02:00

Just love this one and needed to post it on my blog!

By its very nature, life is dynamic. That makes it impossible
to truly stand still.

If you're not moving forward, you're falling behind. So
every day, in some way or another, take action to move your
life forward.

Just a small improvement, just a subtle positive step, is
infinitely preferable to doing nothing. Always, there is
some little something you can do to better your life and
your world.

What can you do right now to solve a problem that's been
frustrating you? What step can you take in the next few
minutes that will bring you closer to the accomplishment of
an important goal?

There is something you can do, and those small efforts
quickly add up as time goes on. So instead of complaining
that you can't get it all accomplished at once, do a little
bit, and then do it again.

Always, your life is filled with energy, and is moving in
one direction or another. Harness that energy, align it with
your highest purpose, and proceed constantly in the
direction of your dreams.

Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

2009-09-09T07:58:00.000+02:00

"A BELIEF IS SOMETHING YOU WILL ARGUE ABOUT, A CONVICTION IS SOMETHING YOU WILL DIE FOR". Howard Hendricks

As we all know a belief starts off as an assumption and slowly through time, experience and events that belief becomes a conviction. Once you have turned your belief into a conviction no-one can persuade you that it is not right or true.

We also know that as we are not born with beliefs, they are created, we can surely then create new beliefs. New powerful ones that serve us and support us instead of holding us back and limiting our potential.

What beliefs are holding you back, right now, from going after what it is that you want to achieve? Do you need help with trashing those limiting beliefs and instead creating new and wonderfully powerful beliefs. Beliefs that will support and lift you instead of dragging you down.

Are you ready to trash those old beliefs and start working on the rest of your life?

If so, contact me on bev@lifecoach4me.co.za and let's get started.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

2009-08-24T14:59:00.000+02:00

"Learning is defined as a change in behavior. You haven't learned a thing until you can take action and use it." Don Shula and Ken Blanchard

I am sitting at my desk re-viewing my client files and our sessions and realise the importance of this quote!

I have the same sessions with various clients day after day. Each person brings their own perspective to the session of the day, so it is all very different and very exciting as I get lots and lots of versions of the same work, or at least different perceptions of the same work. I realise that the people who really fly with the coaching are the people who do the session, go home and work with the particular theme for the day, think about it and then integrate it into their lives. The more I do this work the more I realise that the quote above is absolutely 100% correct!

Until you take the action, and use it, you have not learned a thing!

So, are you ready to take action? If so, contact me for a coaching session. bev@lifecoach4me.co.za

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

2009-08-03T14:53:00.000+03:00

Make your own way

Others can point the way, but you must make the journey.
Others can give you their assistance and advice, but you
must choose the direction of your life.

If you set out to live someone else's dream, you'll end up
frustrated and disappointed. For you have your own special
purpose, a purpose that would be deeply painful to deny.

That purpose is eager to face the greatest challenges and to
grow intensely more meaningful in the process. Your purpose
has a whole wonderful set of achievements that will bring
great fulfillment to your life.

No one, no matter how generous or well-intentioned, can give
you everything you seek. For much of what you seek is to
make your own way in life.

No pleasure can compare to the pleasures you earn through
your own efforts. No reward can equal the reward of creating
your own achievements.

Make the commitment, make the effort, and make your own
beautiful way in life.

Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

2009-07-30T21:21:00.000+03:00

"IT IS EASIER TO MOVE FROM FAILURE TO SUCCESS THAN IT IS TO FROM EXCUSES TO SUCCESS " - John C Maxwell

This rang so true for me. In my job as a Life Coach I deal with taking Responsibility for your life and what happens in it. There are one of three things that we can do in any situation. We can Justify why we have not, or are not doing, something. We can Lay Blame on someone else for not doing, having, be-ing and in both those examples we are giving away our power!

Or, we can take Responsibilty and get on with our lives and how we want our lives to pan out. So, reading John's message for the day really hit home for me.

Are you taking responsbility or are you making excuses in your life?

It is a long time since I posted anything on the blog which in a way is a good thing, because it means that I have been really busy. What a pleasure to be busy in times like this. We are officially in a recession, but that doesn't mean that we have to curl up and wait for it to end.

If we change our mindset to one of abundance and expect that our actions will reap us the rewards, they will!

Look around you and see how many really successful people are ignoring the recession, totally! They are not letting this get them down. Yes, they may not have as much business as last year, or the year before, but that doesn't paralyse them. It spurs them into action.

They realise that they have a choice? Either they expect that things have slowed down and they must sit around and wait - at the cost of their business, or their homes etc.

Or, they can take responsibility and find ways to keep their business, their homes their cars, etc. In the years that SA was not allowed to deal with the rest of the world because of embargoes we found a way to keep our economy thriving. We did things differently and a lot of good came out of that and when we could eventually start playing with the rest of the world, we were ready for them.

So, I suppose my message today is choose what you want to do and then do it. Don't let the fact that we are in a recession become your excuse for sitting on your butt and doing nothing!

Namaste'
Bev
I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

'We cannot become who we need to be by remaining what we are'

2009-06-30T14:05:00.000+03:00

I am sure that everyone knows what the definition of insanity is!

Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

So, who out there thinks that they may be insane? I think that there is a chance that I display some signs of insanity - scary as it may seem.

If we just think about doing things differently things will never change. We actually have to do things differently.

Now taking action isn't always that easy. We all know instinctively what we need to do but to get going is often the problem.

If you are feeling like that about any part of your life, contact me and let's set up a free Introduction session to Life Coaching.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Let Life Come

2009-06-11T10:07:00.000+03:00

Let life come
+++++++++++++++++++

Let life come, without striving to force it. Let life come,
and it will unfold with great abundance.

The feeling you seek is already yours. If it was not, then
how could you even know about it?

Allow that feeling to live and breathe and grow and flow
throughout your life. The life you wish to experience is
yours when you let go and let it be.

Listen to those little inspirations that quietly whisper.
There is a reason why you hear them and feel their truth.

Act in harmony with what you know is right and what you know
is best. Instead of struggling against what is, ride
joyously and successfully along with life's continuously
unfolding possibilities.

Let life come. And live the beauty as each new moment is
born.

Ralph Marston

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

2009-05-26T18:05:00.000+03:00

No plan is worth the paper it is printed on unless it starts you doing something - William Danforth

I absolutely loved this quote when I read it. I find it absolutely fascinating how many people make lists for everything but never seem to get things done! A list of grocery shopping, a list for daily to-do's, a list for things to do around the house, a list for weekend chores, etc. etc.

All of the above lists are really very worthwhile having, as long as you use them and don't keep transferring the items from one list to another, day after day after day.

I find in this very fast pace we live in, to spend so much time writing the lists but very little time getting things done is such a waste of time. Many years ago I was taught to only handle each document once. Work with it and then file it or bin it. There are not that many options when dealing with a document. Either it needs something to be done and you can do it, then do it, or it needs to be delegated, then delegate it or it can be filed immediately, either file it or give it to someone to file! All sounds rather easy and I do know that it is not always that simple, but I do think that we clutter our desks and our minds, but not taking action with a document and then getting rid of it.

So, I am now off to clean up my desk. I am pretty good with keeping my space around me tidy and the wonderful thing about doing this work is that I keep asking myself "What advice would I be giving to my client right now". Work for me.

If you feel you would like a kick start to getting things done, call me and let's get going with some good wholesome life coaching!

Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Effort is a Blessing - by Ralph Marston

2009-05-01T10:40:00.001+03:00

Difficult is nothing more than an arbitrary judgment. Effort
is effort, and you can do it if you choose.

A great achievement requires much effort. Yet that effort is
difficult only when you see it as such.

Instead of obsessing over how difficult or easy it is, just
do it. Focus on the result and, what's even more important,
your reason for making it happen.

Every effort is a blessing. For effort enables you to live
the life you choose to live.

You have the priceless opportunity of being able to do what
it takes. Put joy in the effort, whatever it may be, and
reap the rewards of making a difference.

Welcome the effort and all the value it gives you the
opportunity to create.

Ralph Marston

I love this man's work and felt the need to share this one.
Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

What you commit yourself to will change what you are and make you into a completely different person - Anthony Campolo

2009-04-30T16:12:00.000+03:00

Anthony Campolo was a very wise man! Unless you commit yourself to something you may never get to what it is you want to achieve.

It is amazing how if you share your commitment with people around you, you have a greater chance of achieving the desired results. When you set yourself a goal (commitment) and then share it with other people they can often help you to achieve your goal. Suddenly you are not out there alone but have someone to hold your hand.

Hands up anyone who has ever started a diet.
Hands up anyone who did not lose weight while dieting on their own.
Hands up anyone who followed the same diet, but went to be weighed each week and suddenly started losing weight.

If this has happened to you, welcome to reality! This is not peculiar to dieting but to many different aspects of our lives.

The fact of the matter is that no matter how good our intentions are we often need that extra support and validation from others.

It is great to have someone there to support you in your endeavors and with whom you can share the ups and downs. A natural part of change is regression in the endeavor and when that happens you need someone there to root for you, someone who has your best interests at heart and who is willing to pick you up and get you back on track.

That is what Life Coaching is all about and that is why I LOVE the work that I do. I get to see so many people reaching their goals and growing through the experience. How wonderful is that?

Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Live your Life

2009-04-19T21:56:00.000+02:00

For many people the tragedy isn't that life ends too soon; it's that they wait too long to begin it - John C Maxwell

Does this ring true for some of you?

I sit with wonderful people every single day of my life, in my profession as a Life Coach, and I hear so many interesting stories. I need to tell you that a lot of the stories that I listen to are from people who are waiting for something to happen to give them a sign that it is the right time to start doing and stop thinking.

There is nothing more frustrating than frustration :). Frustration because nothing is happening, frustration because you don't know what to do, frustration because you don't have money, frustration because you can't get going!

I was exactly the same. I waited for many years to make up my mind about doing what I am passionate about, or even to start exploring opportunities that would enable me to live my life doing the things that I love to do. I told myself that I couldn't do anything else because I needed to have the security of employment because I had two little boys and I was a single parent. Then I told myself that I couldn't start anything because my boys needed to have further education. Then I told myself I was getting older and needed security, bla, bla, bla!

We can find excuses for anything and everything, if we so wish. It all depends on how important it is for you to make a change and then take action. Waiting for happiness, a new job, a new car, a new partner a new home is not going to make it happen. Taking action however, will get you a step closer.

I often say to my clients, "How do you eat an elephant?" One bite at a time. Every little step that you take towards change gets you that little step closer.

Remember that while you are comfortable and while you are waiting for things to change, nothing changes!

As with the seasons that we live through each year, so we need to keep changing and growing to fulfill one of our 6 Human Needs. Without growth you feel frustrated and bored.

Remember, one step at a time and that is where I can help you.

Namaste'
Bev

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

2009-04-06T20:49:00.000+02:00

Life isn't fair. It isn't going to be fair. Stop snivelling and whining and go out and make it happen for you - Dick Butler

This one really brought a smile to my face as I just wondered how many times I have said "It's not fair..."

Well it's also not fair that there are millions of people who are born in squalour and die in squalour!

It is not fair that children are born into families where both parents have aids!

It's not fair that half of the world population is starving!

It's not fair that Zuma is now a free man!

It's not fair that taxi driver's drive up the inside lane at high speeds!

It's not fair that there are floods!

It's also not fair that we are given all sorts of opportunities to do things with our lives and we choose to ignore them!

It's not fair that we waste time worrying about what other people have instead of being grateful for what we have - family who love us, our health, our friends, our sight, our limbs, food in our tummies, a roof over our head!

So, are you going to continue moaning about what is not fair in your life, or are you going to stop, think and live the best life you can, in an attitude of grattitude?

I know that I am guilty of the "It's not fair" syndrome but I am not going to carry on with it, decision made......

If you CAN do something about what is not fair, then do it, if you can't then let it go and don't carry around the burden of niggling about what is not fair.

Have a wonderful day further.

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

MINDSET

2009-03-30T18:35:00.000+02:00

This one is not written by me, but I felt such a strong urge to pass it on!

"As my friend was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a rope tied to their legs. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from the ropes they were tied to, but for some reason, they did not. He asked the trainer why these beautiful, magnificent animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away?

The trainer replied that when the elephants were very young and much smaller the used the same size rope to tie them and at that age, it was enough to hold them. As the elephants grew up they were conditioned to believe that they could not break away. They believed the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free!!!! They were stuck right where they were.

The powerful and gigantic creatures have limited their present abilities by the limitation of their past! (Is this starting to sound familiar, I ask?)

Like the elephants, how many of us go through life holding onto a belief that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before? How many of us refuse to attempt somthing new and challenging because of our so called MINDSET?

YOUR ATTEMPT MAY FAIL, BUT NEVER FAIL TO MAKE AN ATTEMPT!

I cannot take responsbility for writing this piece and unfortuantely I do not know who the author is, but I found it very, very powerful and wanted to give you something more to think about.

I would challenge you to think about your limiting beliefs, where they came from and what you can do to change them.

Namaste'
Bev
I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE

Action

2009-03-17T11:01:00.000+02:00

"Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause of fear" Norman Vincent Peal.

What is holding you back, right now, from taking action? I bet if you dig deeply enough you will find somehwere there is fear. We use all other words for not doing what we want and know we should be doing, but a lot of it stems from fear.

This may strange to you, but let's explore it a little. You have a desire to write a book, start a blog, travel to India on a spiritual journey, etc. etc. What is really holding you back. Either your desire is not strong enough and you will use any excuse to make sure you don't have to do what you say you want to do, or you are fearful of the outcome. If you start a book, what happens if you don't find the inspiration to finish it. What happens if you write it and others don't enjoy it, what happens if you approach publishers and they laugh at you, what happens if ..... what happens if...... Well on the other hand what happens if you do find the inspiration to finish it, what happens if your friend LOVE it. What happens if it is published and you make millions? You have a 50/50 chance of success don't you. And, what is the worst that can happen? Is the fear of the worst that can happen paralysing you?

I have found that if you take the time to think about the worst that can happen and face the fear, you will find that it is not that bad anyway.

I was told by my life coach that I need to start a blog. Horror of horrors, I am a dreadful writer! What if no-one wants to read it. What if everyone laughs at me. What if I don't have anything to write about? My life coach would not hear any excuses and so I started the blog called My Journey (which has now changed to Life's Journey) and guess what, my worst fear, when faced, was nothing to really worry about! I write whenever I get the urge! I write about things that I am passionate about. My Life Coaching clients give me inspiration for my blog all the time, because guess what, they are on their Life's Journey and guess what else? We all face so many of the same things on our Life's Journey.

I had to take Action and get my blog written. What action do you need to take, today, to get you where you want to be?

I AM A LIFE COACH AND COACH PEOPLE ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD VIA SKYPE.

“EXPECT EVERYTHING TO GO WELL”...

2009-03-14T11:08:00.000+02:00

“Put your entire focus on anticipating that whatever you are concerned about will go well. Your positive expectations about your situation will steer it in the desired direction."

Remember that worries are influential energies that are perceived as wishes by the universe. When you are troubled, you draw your anxiety into your experiences. Don’t allow your self to give in to fears – deliver them to us angels instead.

Holding positive or negative expectations takes the same amount of time and effort. The outcome of your current situation is guaranteed to be good, yet your experience of the process of getting to that point is influenced by what you think will happen.

If you foresee problems, you will come across them along the way; on the other hand,if you anticipate harmony, then that is what you will experience. Either way, everything is going to turn out just fine – but which path would you prefer to take?

Your expectations set your course.

This was written by Doreen Virtue (the angel lady) and is so in line with my thinking and what I believe in.

Have a wonderful weekend.
Namaste'
Bev

11 March 09

2009-03-11T14:59:00.000+02:00

NOTHING IS SO FATIGUING AS THE HANGING ON OF AN UNCOMPLETED TASK - William James

That thought for the day really got to me!

When I look at my coaching clients, I see that so many of them are on a de-clutter mission. De-cluttering of anything in your life is so cathartic. You clear up the space around you and you feel 'lighter'. You give the 'stuff' that you no longer have use for to someone who can use it and you feel great.

Best of all is the feeling that you get when the unfinished task is complete and not niggling in the back of your mind all the time.

As so many of my clients are de-cluttering I thought it would be a good idea for me to walk the talk! So, I got stuck into my cupboards at about 11 pm the other night. I emerged from my room about 1 hour later with bags and bags of stuff that I gave away.

So, what is the point of this blog? Well apart from hanging on to clothes/shoes/ornaments/linnen for years and years, 'just in case' you may want to use them one day, do you hold on to past hurts, anger, rejections for years and years, 'just in case' you can call them up when you are feeling sorry for yourself?

Why not go through a de-cluttering of your emotions. Keep the ones that serve you and let the rest go. We don't do ourselves any favors by harbouring all the bad thoughts. There is no room in our lives to hold on to the bad, just in case.

If we let it go and make room for the feelings that do serve us it has all sorts of benefits. Living with unforgiveness in our hearts causes dis-ease. All physical dis-ease is a manifestation of something that is going on in our emotions. Do we want to set ourselves up for dis-ease or do we want to live the life we are meant to live. A life full of fun, adventure, love, friendship, etc.? I know which one I would prefer, do you?

Here's to a good de-cluttering of everything in your life. Let go and let live.

Namaste'
Bev

Beliefs

2009-03-01T08:13:00.000+02:00

I would like to start this blog with something to think about.

SOMEONE ELSE'S OPINION OF YOU DOES NOT HAVE TO BECOME YOUR REALITY

That sounds very obvious, but is it? How often have we adopted, someone else's opinion and made it our own truth?

Where do our beliefs come from? Well we all know that beliefs come from various things in our life. You are not born with beliefs, they are created. Now we could well have a belief that is so ingrained in us and if you sit down and think about it, it may have started as someone else's opinion.

Here is an example. As a child you go to a party and there is someone teaching a whole group of you how to do a particular dance. You battle with that particular dance and don't cope that well. Someone tells you not to bother with it because "clearly you can't dance!".

The next time there is a party and you are all asked "who wants to learn a new dance?" you say no thanks, because you remember the last time you battled and you remember the comment that 'clearly you can't dance". And so life goes on and by the time you are an adult, you are so sure that you can't dance, that you would not try it for anyting in the world. Can you imagine how much fun you have lost out on because of someone else's opinion? Was that opinion valid? Should you have tried again? By taking on that opinion what have you missed out on in life?

I challenge you to have a look at some of the things you don't enjoy doing. Some of the things you 'just know you can't do' and ask yourself where you first became aware that you couldn't do it? Was it because you only every tried once and gave up. Was it someone else's opinion of you and now it is your truth?

Have some fun with this. Question your limiting beliefs and you will probably find tht you can trash them. Who knows, the next party you go to you could take over the dance floor and be the star of the show!

Personal Trainer

2009-02-20T11:37:00.000+02:00

Well, well, well! Today I started with my personal trainer. What an experience. I have used a personal trainer many, many years ago but had forgotten what hard task masters they can be. I am working with a wonderful young guy who is new to the industry and full of enthusiasm and energy. He is very strict and does not worry about my age, keeps telling me to get over it (Does that sound familiar to my clients?)

When I look at the dynamic between us, I realise that it is exactly the same dynamic as I have with my coaching clients. I am there to provide the energy to keep them excited about getting to where they want to go. I am there to push them just that little bit further than they would go on their own. Because they come to me on a regular basis, they get on with doing what they need to do to get to their goals, as I am doing with Tshepo.

It is wonderful to go to gym and have someone whose sole interest, for that hour, is me! He is not interested in excuses. He is not interested in hearing that I am tired. He is not interested in anyting other than helping me to get to my goal. I just love it.

So, watch out clients :)
Have a fab weekend.
Namaste'
Bev

Life Coaching

2009-02-16T15:09:00.001+02:00

Well today has been extremely interesting! Not only have I had a session with a Life Coach today, but I have had TWO sessions with two Exceptional Life Coaches. The first one was Lyn Smith who is a Master Life Coach and operates from the UK. We had a two hour session on skype which was absolutely awesome! It made me realise how small the world is and how EASY it is to coach someone in a completely different part of the world. Lyn is such an inspiring lady and one who has so much to offer. I had an introduction session with Lyn who uses the New Insights methodology and it was great to see how a pro in her game does the sessions.

Then I had a session with my Life Coach Kate Emmerson. Kate is another one of those individuals who really inspires you. She has such an easy manner but at the same time doesn't let you get away with anything! Isn't that what Life Coaching is all about :)

Life Coaching is all about pushing you just that tad further than you would normally go. Taking that extra little step like a child learning to walk who has the parent holding their hand and egging them on to greater and greater things. Just like a child learning to walk, coaching gets you to achieve your desires, one step at a time.

I honor the two ladies that I spent time with today for teaching me something new, today.

Namaste'
Bev

The Awakening

2009-02-13T09:56:00.000+02:00

This is an excerpt from something that was sent to me. Unfortunately I don't know the author. It was quite a profound read for me, fairly long but incredibly powerful. Enjoy and post your comments.

The Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it...
When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere, the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

Enough fighting and crying, or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a mantle of wet lashes,you begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening...

You realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon.

You realize that much of the way you view yourself and the world around you,is a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into your psyche.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view.
You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a by gone era, but the mortar that holds ogether the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are ... and that's OK. (They are entitled to their own views and opinions.) And you learn the importance of loving and championing yourself and in the process, a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval.

You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you (or didn't do for you) and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that it's not always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself and in the process, a sense of safety & security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties and in the process, a sense of peace & contentment is born of forgiveness.

You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes.

You learn that just as people grow and change, so it is with love; and you learn that you don't have the right to demand love on your terms, just to make you happy.

You learn that alone does not mean lonely. You look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that you will never be a size 5 or a perfect 10 and you stop trying to compete with the image inside your head and agonizing over how you "stack up."

You learn that for the most part in life, you get what you believe you deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen, is different from working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help.

You learn that the only thing you must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time; FEAR itself.

You learn to step right into and through your fears, because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear, is to give away the right to live life on your terms.

You learn to deal with evil in its most primal state; the ego. You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted; things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about; a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, you begin to take responsibility for yourself, by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never ever settle for less than your heart's desire. You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind, and you make it a point
to keep smiling, to keep trusting and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Hold your Head High

2009-02-09T17:29:00.000+02:00

Received this from a friend today and just had to share :

Standing for what you believe in regardless of the odds against you, and the pressure that tears at your resistance
...is Courage.

Keeping a smile on your face when inside you feel like dying,
for the sake of supporting others
...is Strength.

Stopping at nothing and doing what's in your heart that you know is right
...is Determination.

Doing more than is expected, to make another's life a little more bearable, without uttering a single complaint
...is Compassion.

Helping a friend in need, no matter the time or effort, to the best of your ability
...is Loyalty.

Holding your head high
And being the best you know you can be when life seems to fall apart at your feet,
...is Fortitude.

Facing each difficulty with thoughts that
time will bring you better tomorrows,
And never giving up...
...is Confidence.

9 Feb 2009

2009-02-09T17:09:00.000+02:00

Feeling a little sad right now. A friend of mine's baby, Declan Du Toit, passed over after only 7months and 3 weeks on this plain. What a brave little soul who fought cancer from the day he was born. His parents have been the most amazing people ever, and they have embraced his journey so wholeheartedly. In his very short time here he brought them so much joy and achieved so much on a global basis. They had people from all over the world following their journey with Dec and seeing people that don't even know them sending love and prayers from different parts of the world is absolutely amazing and inspiring. There are so many good souls out there.

Personal Power

2009-02-02T21:15:00.000+02:00

2009 has started off with a bang! I have left my corporate job after 17 years with the group! The day after I left my old job I did the New Insights Advanced Life Coach Course. It was an awesome experience and what a great group of people. We worked with the New Insights No 1 Master Coach, Lyn Smith, who is the most delightful lady and gave us lots of good tips and lessons. She is an absolute inspiration to all coaches.

The title of this blog is Personal Power. You may ask what is personal power?

In my book Personal Power is when you take control of your own life and all the different aspects of it and EMPOWER YOURSELF to live the life you are meant to live. Personal Power is when you STOP justifying and laying blame on others and take action. Personal Power is when you decide that you are the only one who can change what goes on in your life. My niche is Personal Power coaching and if you have the desire to change things in your life, for the better, and need someone to nurture, support and guide you and to kick butt when you are not doing what YOU say you will do, then we are a match made in heaven. I have the skill, training and personal life experience to help you on your journey and look forward to journey with you.

29 November

2008-11-27T06:39:00.001+02:00

Another glorious day. The sun was coming up when I was on my way to work this morning and it was really beautiful. Beause it was a bit overcast it had an ethereal look to it and was truly stunning.

This morning I am looking at my Power questions and thinking "What can I do today that will make a difference?" I have decided that every single person that I see today, irrespective of whether I know them or not, will get HUGE big CHEERY smile.

What can you do today, to make a difference?

In the meantime, take care, look after yourselves and treat yourselves with the love that you deserve.

Namaste'
Bev

25 Nov 2008

2008-11-25T08:44:00.000+02:00

Well, well, well, what a glorious day. The sun is shining, the birds and singing and I can just feel the change in energies :). We are currently seeing the energies of this year leaving and the new ones starting to seat themselves. This is the time of the year where people are feeling betwixt and between and that is absolutely fine. We start moving into our next numerological cycle where we have all our new challenges and excitements ahead of us - all part of our journey. We start thinking of what we want to do with our lives, where we are at and as usual, what New Year's resolutions we can start working on. Well, why wait for the new year to start something? Why not start it now? Why don't we make a difference, right now, today. This is our life and we are in control of when and what happens.

Why don't we make a difference to just one person today? You could choose someone else for this task, or you could choose yourself. I know who I am going to choose today.

Have an absolutely fabulous day
Namaste'
Bev